Archer’s First Sniping Point
Coming In 2011: Indiana Jones and the Legends of Gruber: Nazi’s Die Hardest
Through the coming months, like an elephant tranquilizer to your manhood, you will receive my views on Hollywood. Here is part one of what could be an endless series, “Send All Hollywood Directors to the Moon to SAVE THE CHILDREN (that last part was added to get more attention from would be non readers).
In this first episode, I look over some similarities I have drawn between two of my favorite action-adventure movie franchises, Indiana Jone and Die Hard. I posted the actual similarities in late October after a few days of discussion with one of my long time friends on how we were both disappointed by these glorious movies trying to re identify with the public becuase it is not MTV hip. If you are fans of either movie I know you had to be as disappointed with them as I was. there is not much more that can be said or done, other than hogtying any involved in the production of either of these movies.
My comparison of how Indian Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and Live Free of Die Hard are almost exactly the same, but apart of two very different, long time running movie franchises (warning there are spoilers for both movies in here):
- Indiana Jones movies rank from best to worst: Indiana Jones and Raiders of the Lost Ark (number one), Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (number three),Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (number four), Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (number two)
- Die Hard movies rank from best to worst: Die Hard, Die Hard with a Vengeance (the third movie), Live Free or Die Hard (the fourth movie), Die Hard: Die Harder (the second movie)
Both movies reintroduce the main characters in a later stage in their life
Both expose the main character to new challenges after the third movie related to the first one
- Indy : New Challenge- alien’s and communists / Third movie relates to the first- Marcus Brody, Salem, the Nazis, finding religious artifacts
- Die Hard : New Challenge- Computer programs and computer terrorists / Third movie relates to the first- the Grubers, East German terrorists, the villains trying to distract everyone from their real goal…money
Both have a fresh new face to help them out as well as surviving unlikely situations:
- Indy : Mutt Williams and his bike…swinging with the monkeys, the fight atop the cars during the chase..and surviving a nuclear blast in a fridge
- Die Hard : Justin Longs character always being able to hack something, John McLean throwing a car at a helicopter
Both have female villains that die in gruesome manners:
- Indy : Irina Spalko, the leader of the Red Russian forces, gets ripped apart by the Aliens because she “hungers for knowledge”
- Die Hard : The Asian female hacker gets an SUV dropped on her after falling down an elevator shaft
Both Main characters lives seem to start fresh at the end of the movie:
- Indy : He marries Marion and becomes some high ranking dean at the University he works at
- Die Hard : Lucy, daughter of John, seems to hook up with Justin Long’s character( though no one knows for sure…it is assumed happened off screen…they at least go to Starbucks or something..and yes going to Starbucks is a date) while John McClean and his daughter reacquaint on happier terms
Both have characters we are not sure whose side they are on:
- Indy : Mac, seems to switch sides every scene from the allies to the commies…he’s like a 6 time agent or something
- Die Hard : Freddy, the computer hacker, knows the main villain and talks with him during a scene…also Freddy hates the Fuzz…..and all who think Boba Fett is Han Solo
Both series seem like they can continue. Are there fifth movies of either of these coming out. Well according to all the main components of either series, they all say they would come back for a fifth movie if everything played oput the way they wanted it to. Which will we get a fifth one of first? I want to put my money on Die Hard, but Lucas is running out of ideas with Star Wars, so it seems like he will ened another Indiana Jones movie. Didn’t he say he wanted to settle down away from the big blockbuster titles and work on romantic comedies?
February 12th, 2009 at 2:25 pm
the asian chick from the last die hard movie was hot.
February 13th, 2009 at 1:53 am
Yes Maggie Q is pretty gorgeous….
March 11th, 2009 at 2:30 am
First of all, it’s John McClane (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_McClane), not John Mclean.
Second, are you saying that you did or did not like these movies? It seems a little unclear. Personally, I’ve decided that I like both of them. I’ve never really been a huge Die Hard fan, but they’ve always been fun-time-at-the-movies action flicks, and Live Free did not disappoint in that respect. Actually, I thought the plot for “Live Free” was more engaging than than the first Die Hard. As far as Crystal Skull goes, it took me awhile to decide whether I liked that movie or not, and ultimately, I’ve decided that I do in fact enjoy it. Your ranking it higher than Temple of Doom tells me you must feel the same, but I’m not sure. I think the only part of Crystal skull I didn’t like was the “Nuking the ‘fridge” scene, and in a way it’s a shame it came so early in the film, because it did dampen my enjoyment a little. I realize that Indiana Jones movies have always had some over-the-top get-out-of-jail-free moments, but even so, the fridge went a little too far. Otherwise, I thought the film was very well done, and most importantly, it *felt* like an Indiana Jones movie. (Especially the quicksand scene) I suppose that’s my two cents, and I’m looking forward to more movie rants.
Third, I’m sorry I posted this comment a month (really?) after you posted the blog.
March 12th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
Hey don’t worry about posting a month late. I have been sort of busy and I am glad I check my mail this morning to respond. I did in fact enjoy both Live Free or Die Hard and Crystal Skull. I was merely only drawing the very socking similarities between both film franchises. I rate both Indy 4 and Die Hard 4 in third place over both franchise’s 2nd films. I believe the original Die Hard to be the best out of the 4. Mainly becuase I love action films like that. If you are a Chuck fan, you should check out the Christmas episode becuase Big Al’s brohter (the manager of the Buy More) is Sgt Al Powell from the original Die Hard, same actor and everything. It was an excellent throwback.
Also I will rant on a number of topics…but there are movie ones coming.